I Haven't Laughed This Hard In Ages.

Oh. My God. I know I don't utilize this blog much anymore...but to those of you who still have me on your rss feeds, you need to cancel your plans for the next thirty minutes or so, because I'm here to drop some serious entertainment value into your lives.

OPRAH'S YOUR OWN SHOW

So after performing some serious after-bar web browsing tonight, I stumbled across Your Own Show, Oprah Winfrey and emmy-producer Mark Burnett's new television reality series, which documents a group of Americans as they battle it out to become the next...wait for it...reality television star.

Your brains probably hurt from reading that last sentence, so take a second, loosen up, and I'll say it again.

It's a reality television show that finds the next reality television star.

Okay. Now conventionally, this is the part of my blog where my head explodes and I spend the next one thousand words dissecting all the wondrous absurdities hidden beneath the human spirit...but people, there are bigger things I need to show you right now. Trust me on this.

The concept is simple. To get onto the Your Own Show competition, potential contestants record a 2-3 minute video clip of a creative, inspiring reality show that they would host. These folk then upload their personal videos onto the main Your Own Show website...and via the wonders of the wild, wild web, the public votes on the brightest and best. In the end, the ten-or-so people with the highest vote count become reality contestants on the Your Own Show reality show...and from there, they all engage in some messy, high-drama, twenty-two-episode battle towards reality superstardom.

Just so you can get a sense of what Oprah/Burnett are looking for, the video categories range from "Traditional Talk Show" to "Cooking" to "Health & Well-Being" to "Fashion".

That all being said, below, in no particular order, are my favorite finds tonight (the multiple titles may or may not have been created by me).

TEACHING: A WORTHY FALLBACK CAREER IF THERE EVER WAS ONE
OR
THE FACULTY ROOM: IF THESE WALLS COULD TALK

SOMETIMES DISCUSSING RESPONSIBILITY MEANS WATCHING A DOG GET HIS NAILS PEDI-FILED WHILE A STRANGER WHISTLES
OR
LET'S BE HAPPY FOR THE ONE WHO DID IF WE'RE THE ONE WHO DIDN'T

OVER ENUNCIATING YOUR OVER-CONFIDENCE
OR
WAIT, WHY HASN'T MY VIDEO UPLOADED TO MATCH.COM ALREADY?


NAUGHTY PIGS WHO CHANGE THEIR WAYS: A TRADITIONAL TALK SHOW

PICKIN' UP MEN AT THE DUCK POND IS SOOOO 2008.